Get your holiday gift wrap here

tiltjlp

PN co-founder
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Favorite Pinball Machine
Flying Trapeze 1934
As a public service, I'm offering 4 different computer related design this year. Only $1 a sheet, minimum order 12 sheets each design plus $12.50 shipping and $7.50 handling. I will buy back any unused sheets at $.25 a sheet, as long as you pay for return shipping. $1.75 will be deducted from all refunds to cover the cost of the envelope and postage stamp.

John :oldman
 

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Get Out Of Hell cards for sale

As an added service, the tiltjlp online store is now offering single use Get Out Of Hell Free cards. No, these cards won't keep you from buring if you've lived a horrible life and deserve eternal damnation. But they will get you out of countless situations that seem even worse than hell. Men , you can use a GOOHF card to excuse you from answering all those questions your wife or girlfriend asks, such as "Does this dress make me look fat? or Isn't this a darling china pattern?" It can also get you out of going to a piano recital the day of the big game.

Ladies, just imagine all the Man things you can avoid with the use of one of our GOOHF cards. Strangely, we've found that these cards are good for 1 use only. Seems that the person you use it on will be so upset that they will tear it into little pieces and drop it at your feet. Order a supply not only for yourself but all your fishing buddies, or women's club members, as the case may be.

GOOHF cards come in eithe packs of 50 for $19.95 plus $5.05 for shipping, or our economy pack of 250 for $122.50 with free shipping. Or buy our Deluxe Saver Bundle and get 500 GOOHF cards and 50 sheets each of our four gift wrap designs for the low price of $250.00 plus $35.00 shipping. We thank you for letting us give you the business.

John :oldman
 

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Well, if that card had Jesus on it instead of the Monopoly guy, it might be worth its face value. ;)
 
How do you know, that maybe Jesus, that popular figure that represents......nevermind, craven images and all that, best not go there. ;)
 
Pacdude said:
Well, if that card had Jesus on it instead of the Monopoly guy, it might be worth its face value. ;)

We tried to get his endorsement, but the Holier Than Thou division of the Moral Minority outbid us on the licensening fees war. I sure hope I'm right that He has a good sense of humor.

John
 
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